Dear Younger Me,

I love you. You are an exquisite diamond in the rough and you will be great. There is a thinking phenomenon called ‘Growth Mindset” that can change your life if you let it. Mindsets are the beliefs you have about yourself, who you are, and what you can do. As people, we have two mindsets hungry within us. One is the fixed mindset which says I have what I have and that is it. If I wasn’t born with it them I wasn’t meant to have it. The other is the growth mindset which says all that I am can be made greater. I can be developed and expanded through effort and determination. This way of thinking, with a growth mindset, is essential to life because it reduces the amount of fear we allow to sit in our consciousness. You get the necessary push you need to embrace you challenges and see them as areas of opportunity instead of limitations. Think about how far you want to go and all of the things you have yet to learn. You will need this mental shift to get moving and stay on course. This mindset is more than positive thinking. It is a basic model to deconstruct (unlearn) to reconstruct (relearn).

Carol Dweck, Ph.D., is the frontrunner of research and study in the area and wrote a wonderful book called Mindset: The New Psychology of Success; which details how success in every area of the human experience can be exorbitantly influenced by the way we think about our talents and our abilities.

There are four steps involved in changing your mindset:

Step 1: Learn to hear your "fixed" mindset voice.

Step 2: Recognize that you have a choice.

Step 3: Talk back to it with a growth mindset voice.

Step 4: Take the growth mindset action.

You are going to want to incorporate these steps one at a time. Lessons are meant to grow you and encourage perseverance. Even though you fail you should not be catapulted into self-doubt and negative thinking about your abilities. Oh, don’t be fooled into thinking applying effort is enough. It is not because you often get praised for effort but you don’t learn anything. I need you to learn something. I need you to be able to look at what you tried and have resources and options on hand to evaluate what you can try next.

I know. I know. You are like how am I going to incorporate this and be successful. I got you. Start with step 1. Learn to hear your fixed mindset by tuning in to the possibility that the experience will help you overcome something you have struggled with. You now this is true in your relationships as well as in business and school too. You are going to be a teacher and you will need to encourage your students to evaluate themselves and their challenge. They will need to take risks and assess the outcome. You remember what that was like don’t you. Keep doing this and because I know you, when you feel yourself getting relaxed I have already put an accountability check in place. Was it mastered or mimicked will start to pop up out of nowhere.

Now step 2 is awesome for you because you enjoy having options. Recognizing that you have a choice means that this is not mandatory. Everyone you encounter will need to know that desire is key here. You have to want it. You have to want to see things differently and stretch yourself. Yes, you are smart but you don’t need to prove yourself for accolades.

When you are in the midst of processing explore step 3 and talk back to your fixed mindset. When you feel defeated or discouraged call her by name and set her straight. Empower yourself and shift the focus. This looks like embracing something called the ‘yet’ message. It simple says to all of your challenges and struggles that even though you are not there now you will get there if you apply yourself and shift how you think. You know instead of saying “I can’t do this” say “I can’t do this yet”. Or instead of saying “Plan A didn’t work so forget it” say “there are 25 other letters in the alphabet, keep going”. It’s not rocket science but it does take training your mind. When you tell other people about ‘yet’ keep it simple. Don’t over complicate it. Don’t try and force people to follow just lead by example. Use this website called pinterest. It has an abundance of images that depict the message of yet. Here is the link to one of my favorite: https://www.pinterest.co.uk/pin/87186942765394635. I know how much you thrive off of messages of affirmation.

Dweck argues people with fixed mindsets are all too willing to give up when the going gets tough, convinced that they "just don't have what it takes" to overcome intellectual challenges. People with growth mindsets, however, see struggles and failures as opportunities to learn.  She writes “The passion for stretching yourself and sticking to it “even (or especially) when it’s not going well, is the hallmark of the growth mindset”. This is step 4 comes into the picture. You have to take action. Not just any action but growth mindset action. You are doing the things you are training your mind to believe you can do. You are actively exchanging what you currently know for what you want and plan to achieve. You can do it. I know where you will end up because I am here now. If you can just grab some of this life will be so much better for you. As an educator, a lover, a friend, etc... Trust me.

I want you to promote the growth mindset daily but I know you. You’re going to get frustrated. To start, write in your calendar to promote this way of thinking every Tuesday and Thursday. Start using it in trainings and when you get into the classroom. You can use it in professional developments too.

When you start the masters program at Lamar University the growth mindset will help you approach the course with optimism. You know you do not know as much about tech and digital learning as most people. You still send cards through the post and have a home phone that you enjoy. Make part of your mantra the ‘yet’ message and encourage yourself to think outside of the box, dive head into things you struggle with, and pull from your peers. You will learn so much from them. Share your thoughts and resources with them. Don’t be afraid to use theirs. You can do it. You are The Greatest!